Chick Flicks
by Sacmis
Summary: Ai reflects on her relationship to Shinichi and Shinichi and Ran's relationship. first DC fic!


A/n: Having watched DC for years I thought I might as well try writing a bit of fanfic for it. Hope you like it!

Disclaimer: owning a few copies of the manga sadly doesn't make it myn

I try to find a reason to hate her – or at the very least dislike her. But I can't. Logically I can't. Sure the fact that she believes in ghosts and cries a fair bit can be seen as irritating by some. But it's not enough of a reason to justify what I feel towards her. If I dig a bit deeper I realize that I'm lying to myself by saying the hate I feel is directed at her. I don't hate her. I envy her so much that by all rights my eyes should be glowing green with jealousy.

Why does she have to be so damn nice? I exhale loudly clearly frustrated.

'What's wrong Haibara?' A child's face turns towards me, the concerned little pull of his bottom lip and knitting of his eyebrows, looking so out of place on his young face. The strings of my heart twist sharply but my bored expression betray nothing.

'I'm just bored. I'm going to go read for a bit.' A lie. One among many. But what was I supposed to say_? I don't like the love of your life because...because I love you to._

I gasped loudly. It was the first time I had ever admitted it to myself. I tried to take the thought back but that was easier said than done. Once it was out there it refused to come back. I gave a small, humourless chuckle. _Time to face the music I guess._

So yeah, I l – love Shinichi Kudou. I was never one much for chick flicks or fairytales but I see the problem with our situation. Shinichi and Ran, they belong to one classic chick flick – the 'we're friends from when we're little' type. Shinichi and I on the other hand belong to the 'boy meets girl under abnormal, action packed circumstances' flick.

The problem is the two overlap and that definitely shouldn't happen. I prefer the latter. Much more interesting don't you think? I shake my head sadly. What **I** prefer is irrelevant. At the end of the day it comes down to what **he **wants.

I think he knows. That I like him, I mean. He isn't a detective for nothing. Besides, my indifferent behaviour towards her is a sort of give away; She makes me soup when I'm sick. She saves my life, completely ignoring the risk to her own...I haven't once thanked her.

Shinichi knows, I'm certain. I think he's probably just trying to be a gentleman and act like he doesn't. That would be so like him. He's probably secretly hoping that it's only a phase – that it's an attachment I feel simply because we've been thrown in to this situation together and he's the first true friend I've ever had.

I think he's right, or at the very least I hope he is. It's definitely plausible. Makes our 'not-so-romantic chick flick' seem more platonic than ever. The strings twist a little more sharply. _This is way too much to think about it one go._ The bell rang offering a welcome distraction. I ran to answer it before the Professor or 'Conan' could.

'Hi Ai-chan, how are you?' I looked up in to the smiling face of the one I envied. Yes, she really was nice.

'Ran nee-chan?' Conan's surprised exclamation came from behind me. I turned to face him and it was as if everything within him glowed. **Her** presence did that to him. She smiled a warm, motherly smile at him.

'You mentioned that Professor Agasa sprained his wrist, so I thought I'd bring you all some lunch.' She held up the bag in her arms, still smiling. How could she smile so much? How could she care for others so much?

I was about to say 'no thanks I'm not hungry,' but my stomach rumbled loudly. Ran giggled slightly before saying, 'Come on. I'll set up right away.' They moved to the table, Professor Agasa thanking her profusely. I stood there, rooted to the spot, watching them interact.

Trying to keep an objective perspective for once, I felt a veil lift from my sight. I saw things I had previously been blind to. Like the way Shinichi's body was subconsciously always tilted towards her, even when he was speaking to professor Agasa. Or the small flash of pain and wistfulness that crossed Ran's face when Conan took of his glasses to rub his eyes. No doubt she was reminded of **him.**

Shinichi and Ran were mentally much older than their tender 17 years. With him I'd always noticed it through the intelligence but now could actually feel it through wisdom that had nothing to do with intelligence. The phrase 'so near and yet so far' couldn't have been more true. What did it cost him to be able to carry on lying to her?

And Ran. She was strong, exceptionally so. How could I not have noticed it before? I'd always known how strong she was physically but her mental strength made her physical seem so insignificant in comparison. She was practically already head of her household what with Mori-san being even less than useless. She was by no means stupid and yet risking your life to save that of a little girl whilst taking no heed of the risk to your own, could be considered stupid. Or honourable. She was a martyr through and through. Not many people as compassionate as her exist (certainly not that I've ever met).

It was then I realized how unjust I had been to their 'chick flick' scenario. It wasn't just a 'best friend' thing. It was so much more than that. It was a story of endurance. Of patience. Of trust. Of belief that he would return. A story of sacrifice and heartache. This was more than just a chick flick. This was real. It was fate. And who was I to get in the way of fate?

A dull thud resounded in my chest. It hurt, but not as much as before. _I suppose it isn't love then. At least not in that way_. It was the fear of being lonely, I realize with a start.

'Ai-chan, come eat!' Ran calls me holding out a bowl of food towards me. I smile my first true smile at her.

'Hai!' I skip over and take it from her eagerly. They all seem taken aback by my sudden exuberance, most of all Conan. I shake my head slightly at him, still smiling.

'So Professor, are you going to come up with another quiz for the Detective Boys?' I ask. The shocked silence shatters as Agasa tells us about his latest codes. A warm feeling wraps around my chest as I look round at everyone. No, I shouldn't fear loneliness. I have a family. For the first time in my life, I'm content.

A/n: so what dyu think?

I'd love it if you could leave a review-they really help me to improve my writing.

Thanks for reading this fic!

DCC x


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